Coming Clean: Health, Happiness, and Helping Others

In the last two years, I’ve gone through some major steps in self-discovery; I have left my comfort zone, I have tested my limits, and I’ve overcome some massive obstacles. I have found out who I am post-serious relationship, and realized I really liked the Phoenix buried inside that had risen from the ashes of a wrecked life plan.

I have become someone I really like being, most days. And really, my level of personal success is astounding, especially to me. I’m told I’ve “beaten” the odds and that I’ve accomplished amazing things. Some days I can recognize that; most, however, it just feels like survival with a healthy dose of good luck and the right support network.

Essentially, though, I’ve got an interesting story to tell, one that could inspire others to overcome and reach out. I’ve battled a lot of demons, big ones, and have wanted to share these stories. There was one big obstacle, though.

My mom. I hadn’t told her about a few things. I never wanted her to blame herself and I didn’t want to hurt her. Recently, I finally addressed that roadblock. On Thanksgiving, I told my mom about the role that bulimia has played in my life since I was 19 — she had never known.

Now that she does, I feel something akin to catharsis. Now that she knows, I can share my story of hope and perseverance, without fear of her finding out “the wrong way.”

I don’t want to say it will be a prevalent topic here on the blog now that I’ve opened up about it. But, maybe by publicizing this I can inspire faith, hope, and encouragement for others silently suffering from eating disorders and emotional disorders. (The bulimia essentially developed as a side-effect of bipolar disorder.) Maybe this can lead to more avenues to help people who are seeking encouragement and support while facing similar obstacles.

I am a success story.

While I wish I could have never experienced this, it’s shown me some amazing sides to the human race. These hardships have shown me how loved I am, and how beautiful the heart truly is. People are amazing. Whether it was through small acts of kindness that helped me recover some self esteem after a relapse, or listening when I needed it most, or prayer, or tough love from a boss-slash-friend-slash-mentor (that’s a great story that I want to write about sometime)…I have seen the beauty of people. For that, I am grateful.

I don’t know where it all goes from here. But, now that it’s out there, I feel…good about it all. I hope I can serve as a light for someone, someone like me that could use the encouragement when things feel at their worst.

I hope everyone had a beautiful Thanksgiving. For me, it marked the start of a new chapter.


26 thoughts on “Coming Clean: Health, Happiness, and Helping Others

  1. Kelly it was so great to meet you this fall. You are already an inspiration to people, and I believe by opening up even more you are about to inspire and encourage a whole other group of people. You are awesome!

  2. Tears streaming and a lot of sniffling from me as I read this Kelly. This took guts. Thank you for telling your mom and now boldly sharing. You may never know the true impact of speaking out during your earthly life but I know you have just inspired many who are struggling. I am very proud of you in a very sisterly sort of way πŸ™‚
    Love ya

  3. foo, i can only hope that the secrets that you hide inside still are no where near the level of what you have already over come and talked about here. we all have skeletons in the closets that we work everyday to adapt to and conquer. for some of us the problem took years to develop or learn and even longer to correct after the damage has already been done, usually to those that surround us. i too have had a lot of things to publicly address, face myself, and still seek help for on a regular basis. i dont know the struggles of bi-polar but i do have numerous other “issues” for lack of better terminology that i deal with on a daily basis. dont ever feel you are alone and no one will understand. we may not understand your exact problem but we understand the fall and climb to rise back to where we once were and how to face and embrace those that we have hurt around us.

  4. Oh Kelly dear! Tears in my eyes, but happy tears. Tears that you are healing, that you are growing into the woman you want to become. Life never is easy, but we do find amazing strengths that we never knew we had. If not for those obstacles, we would lack depth in our souls. Hugs across the miles……..

  5. Kelly, you’re so brave, and I love how you shared your journey of talking with your mom before writing here. I’ve wrestled with this myself, wanting to write through some things but afraid my family would find out from the internet instead of from me. I haven’t been brave enough (yet!) to write or talk with them, so I am inspired by your post!

    • Mary, thank you so much for the kind words. While I hope you can find the courage to do what you need to, I also believe that all of our paths can (and should) be different. If you aren’t ready, or if you don’t feel like you need to share these stories, then that is okay too. You are brave, special, strong, and loved despite whatever you choose in that regard. But, keep in touch. Wherever your journey goes, I hope it continues to be one of growth and perseverance! Good luck!

  6. Kelly, I’m so glad we’ve become such close friends over the past few months..? Maybe almost a year by now. I’ve loved watching how far you’ve come and the beautiful person you continually strive to be. I didn’t know you during your period of struggle but the fact that you’ve overcome it, opened up, and are willing to put it all out on the table make me proud. New chapters are exciting and we both started new ones over Thanksgiving!

    • Oh Jenny, I’m glad we’re friends too. This is an exciting time in life for both of us, and I’m SO PUMPED for you. You’ve always been so encouraging and supportive of me, and I appreciate that so much. While I feel like your new chapter is a lot more YAY than mine, I’m glad we can experience big moments like this together.

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