This is a relationship post. And I hope y’all think it’s as hilarious as Nightwolf and I do.
Sometime shortly after we had the “define the relationship” (or DTR) talk, in which we decided to become “Facebook official” and start meeting each other’s friends and families when the opportunity arose, Nightwolf and I realized we weren’t sure when our first date was. Using our stellar skills of Facebook creeping and math, we decided it was February 27th, 2013.
We even made a Facebook Life Event for it so we wouldn’t forget.
Fast forward a while. We’ve taken road trips together, each of us had a birthday, we know each other’s parents and even some extended family. Our dogs now have matching collars, and we have long-term dreams together. We did the math and got excited when we realized that August 27th would be our six month anniversary — and even though neither of us are big on “monthiversaries” it seemed fitting that we go back to the bar where we first met and have drinks.
You see, Nightwolf and I met online. Actually, he found me on Match.com. They listed me as one of his “suggested matches” and when he saw a picture of me wearing an Avengers shirt, he knew he had to meet me. Our first date was the first time we’d ever met, despite having messaged online and then exchanged text messages for over a month. I cancelled on him a few times, and when he asked what I’d do if he turned out to be a creep, I sent him a picture of me holding my 5-inch long Gerber military knife (a gift from a Marine friend who was worried about me living alone in the city) and said, “We won’t have a problem.” I was cynical and emotionally flighty. Nightwolf had reservations about my obvious lack of investment, but was tenacious despite. He’s tough like that.
So, when we finally went on a date, it was a big deal. And after falling madly, hopelessly, did-not-expect-this-to-happen in love, we wanted to celebrate that date that Nightwolf fought so hard make happen. And we were SO sure that date happened on February 227th.
I posted this thoughtful status about how “Six months ago, I met blah blah blah…”
Then Nightwolf sent me a text. The conversation went something similar to this:
Nightwolf: My mom thinks it’s our five months, not our six.
Me: Nuh uh. We figured it out. We used blizzards and memories!
Nightwolf: Yeah, my mom thinks we didn’t go on a date until March.
Me: But I cancelled on you to hang out with friends that were in town!
Nightwolf: Maybe you’re right.
Me: I HAVE TO KNOW.
Me: Yeah, your mom is right. My friend was in town early March. Which means that our first date was March 20th.
(This is not verbatim.)
Yup. A look at my work/personal calendar, a reference to the friend’s visit which delayed our date, and knowing it was a Wednesday meant that our actually first date was a full three weeks later than we’d thought.
So, what do we do? Do we go with our “approximate anniversary” which is actually a month off, and leave Facebook as it was? Or do we correct our mistakes?
Obviously, because we’re awesome* and have good senses of humor, we laugh at ourselves as publicly as possible. I changed the date of our Life Event and re-shared my thoughtful romantic status with corrections. And we’ve both been laughing hysterically today because of it. We cancelled our “anniversary date” tonight in favor of quiet nights in on our own, and a promise that on September 20th, we’d do this anniversary thing “right.” In the meantime, we’ll keep laughing, and prepare for another big adventure: Nightwolf going back to my hometown with me. (Guys, he’s meeting my big brothers for the first time ever. This is a big deal.)
There’s a lesson in all this, though.
Details are important, yes. As an advertiser, I know details can make or break a campaign, win a new client or blow our chances with them. Details matter. But, don’t lose sight of the forest while you focus on a tree. Nightwolf and I were excited to celebrate a milestone together, but regardless of whether our first date was February 27th or March 20th, what really matters is this:
- We are in love.
- We are both happier than we have ever been before.
- We are willing to work on things together, talk through our disagreements, and make compromises while also striving to be happy and healthy, together. (What’s strange to me, though, is how EASY and natural it is. Relationships take work, yeah, but I never feel like I have to work that hard to have an amazing relationship with Nightwolf.)
So, our “six month anniversary” is delayed by almost a month. In the big picture, this is something to laugh (hysterically) about later (or, you know, right now). In the big picture, we are two stupidly-happy lovebirds enjoying the adventures of life like we never have before. And that’s a big picture I sure do like.
*Awesomeness is subjective. This is not a scientific claim, merely an opinion of what a great couple Nightwolf and I are.